My Chains Are Gone!

We sang Amazing Grace in church this morning.  That song always touches me, especially the newer version that incorporates "my chains are gone."  I couldn't help but be moved to tears as I sang...

     My chains are gone, I've been set free
     My God, my Savior has ransomed me
     And like a flood His mercy reigns
     Unending love, amazing grace

I'll be honest, this girl who was raised in a conservative, Baptist church wanted to hold her hands high and yell down from the balcony, "MY CHAINS ARE GONE!"  I might have done just that if the tears hadn't choked me up.  Instead, I just sang with all the love in my heart to my amazing Savior as I considered the prison cell he has brought me from.

No, I don't mean a literal prison cell (but almost...), I mean a prison of my own making.  The prison of my sin and shame.  It saddens me to admit that through the years, I've been enslaved to many different sins and struggles.  My prison bars were made up of pride and fear, people-pleasing and alcohol, selfishness and doubt...and the list goes on.

This morning, as I sang, I was particularly grateful for the loosened shackle of people-pleasing.  I've spent most of my life doing my best to impress others in hopes that they would think highly of me.

Did you catch that last part?

...that they would think highly of ME.

I spent most of my life more concerned about what people thought of me than what they thought of my Heavenly Father.  Getting others' approval was a chain that held me captive and even caused me to hide my faith in certain situations.

In fact, that is the part of my past that brings me the most shame.

Like Peter, I hid the truth about my relationship with Christ to save my own skin.  Not that claiming Him would have resulted in losing my life but at that time disapproval was a fate worse than death, in my opinion.

By God's grace and His grace only, I can honestly say that now I am MORE concerned with what others think of my Father than of me.  He has set me free from worrying about the opinions of others and whether or not I measure up.  My focus is to properly represent HIM and point to HIM...and if the world disapproves of me in the process, let them.  I'm no longer their slave.

Romans 6:16-18 - Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey —whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?  But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were entrusted.  You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.

Praise God, my chains are GONE!!!

No First Day Jitters Here!

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.  Lamentations 3:22-23

School starts in the morning.

For some (namely students), the mere mention of summer coming to its official end is enough to cause panic or an emotional breakdown.  For me on the other hand, it is an event met with giddiness and delightful anticipation.

Now, before you label me a weirdo (or a liar) there's something you should know.  My excitement over the new school year does not stem from the fact that I'm a nerd or that I get paid really well (ha!) or that I just love my job (although that is a true statement...and maybe so is the nerd thing).  Truthfully, my excitement has everything to do with one simple truth...

I love new beginnings!

I always have.  I love the idea of a clean slate or fresh start.  This is true for many things in my life, including the new school year, moving to a new city or home, and especially the promise that God's mercies are new every morning.

One of the things I try to do every year is forget what I thought I knew the year before.

I know, that's a strange thing for a teacher to say.  What I mean is that I try to erase all the rumors and impressions and even encounters that I had with my students the previous school year.  Maybe I had them in class and they weren't as well-behaved as I would have liked.  Or maybe I overheard talk of things they did on the weekend.  Or maybe it was simply my perception that they didn't try as hard, academically, as I thought they could or should.  Regardless of the situation and regardless of the student, I do my best to give them a clean start the following August.

Why?

Because that's what my Heavenly Father does for me.  Every. Single. Day.

Do I deserve it?  No.  Do I understand it?  Not really.  Do I relish it and strive to extend even just a portion of the same grace to others?  Absolutely.

After five years of teaching high schoolers, I've learned something.  They won't remember much of my class syllabus or lectures.  They won't remember all the test questions (if any) or how cute my classroom was.  They may not remember which entrepreneur or playwright they researched, but maybe - hopefully - they'll remember a teacher who modeled Christ.

That is my prayer on the eve of the 2012-2013 year.  Lord, let your light shine through me, help me point these precious young people to you and may I be full of mercy and grace as I gratefully accept yours.  Great is your faithfulness!

Every Man

And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’ Matthew 25:40

While in Lubbock this weekend with my step-sister, Katie, we were stopped at a red light where a homeless man with a sign was camped.  Katie began digging through her purse and I assumed it was to give money to the man.  That began a discussion on giving and homeless people.  We both agreed that although there was a chance that man might misuse our funds, giving is what a Christian should do and the Bible clearly states that what you do to the “least of these” you do to Christ.  Unfortunately, the light turned green before either of us was able to unearth cash from our overloaded purses.  As we sped away, Katie muttered under her breath, “Sorry, Dude.  I hope you weren’t Jesus.”

Obviously, I had to laugh at that statement but the principles behind that event have been gnawing at me for two days now.  Even before spending the weekend in Lubbock, I’ve been thinking a lot about God’s love and people.  Not specific people, necessarily...just people in general.  I’ve been asking myself a very difficult question. 

Do I love people the way Christ loves them?

Sadly, the answer is no.  And it’s not even a matter of whether I would give my life for them.  So often I fail to look at people through the eyes of their Creator and see someone of worth, someone who is loved.  Instead I find myself being critical and judgmental – looking down my nose at “the least of these”.

I’ve been asking God to help me with this and give me HIS attitude and HIS heart when it comes to those around me.  He’s been quick to answer me and just this morning, he brought an amazing song across my path that I will share with you.  As I listened to the lyrics, my prayer changed just slightly.  I continue to pray that I would love others with the love of my Savior but now I ask that my fellow believers would join me so that together we can be the hands and feet of Jesus…to every man.

Everyman

By Casting Crowns

I'm the man with all I've ever wanted


All the toys and playing games


I am the one who pours your coffee, corner booth each Saturday


I am your daughter's favorite teacher


I am the leader of the band


I sit behind you in the bleachers


I am every man



I'm the coach of every winning team and still a loser in my mind


I am the soldier in the airport facing giants one more time


I am the woman shamed and haunted by the cry of unborn life


I'm every broken man, nervous child, lonely wife



Is there hope for every man


A solid place where we can stand


In this dry and weary land


Is there hope for every man


Is there love that never dies


Is there peace in troubled times


Someone help me understand


Is there hope for every man



Seems there's just so many roads to travel, it's hard to tell where they will lead


My life is scarred and my dreams unraveled


Now I'm scared to take the leap


If I could find someone to follow who knows my pain and feels the weight


The uncertainty of my tomorrow, the guilt and pain of yesterday



There is hope for every man


A solid place where we can stand


In this dry and weary land


There is hope for every man


There is Love that never dies


There is peace in troubled times


Will we help them understand?


Jesus is hope for every man

Flying Cows Ahead

We all know that in this life there will be storms.  Not just the kind with thunder and lightning, but the kind that bring devastation into our lives.  We've been told that these emotional, relational and spiritual squalls will make us stronger and better Christians on the other side.  Some of us have even experienced that phenomenon firsthand.

I've been through a little "bad weather" myself and I've watched family and friends endure a tidal wave of bad news, heartbreak, disease and loss.  All this time, I've viewed these storms as something we were asked to weather but recent time spent in God's Word brought this question to mind:

What if in some cases we should be seeking out these storms?

I know.  It sounds crazy.  

Who goes looking for trouble?  It reminds me of the movie Twister.  I never understood how someone would willingly chase tornadoes for a living.  I spent my West Texas childhood fearing twisters and hiding to stay out of their way.  To this day, a tornado warning on TV is enough to accelerate my breathing.

You know what else sounds crazy?  Read the following passage from Jeremiah:

⁸ “Furthermore, tell the people, ‘This is what the Lord says: See, I am setting before you the way of life and the way of death.⁹ Whoever stays in this city will die by the sword, famine or plague. But whoever goes out and surrenders to the Babylonians who are besieging you will live; they will escape with their lives.

I've been dwelling on this passage for the last week or so because, like so many parts of the Bible, it seems counterintuitive. How does waving the white flag to the guys who are pummeling your city ensure that you will live?  I mean, it's one thing to brace yourself for an attack and pray that God will see you through but it's a completely different thing to barge in front of the firing squad.

I was reminded a few days ago that the story of Jonah has a similar element.  Instead of waiting on board the boat for the storm to pass, he knew that the answer was to jump headfirst into the raging sea. (Maybe I added the headfirst part but that's always how I've pictured it - a hasty swan dive of sorts.)

Point being this, many of us spend our lives hiding in storm shelters, hoping to avoid destruction.  A dedicated few may weather their storms with grace and dignity, but how many of us actually seek them out?  How many of us pray, Lord, take me through the storm that I may grow closer to you?  How many of us are storm chasers?

To be honest, I don't know exactly what that would look like in our lives.  Perhaps it means surrendering to missions on a dangerous field.  Maybe it means inviting a storm of criticism by speaking the truth in love.  Whatever shape it takes, I know one thing for sure. I want to take the "way of life" the Lord speaks of in Jeremiah.  If that means chasing storms like a crazy person, then so be it.

To quote Twister, "I gotta go Julia.  We got cows."

I Have a Secret...

I barely passed Poli Sci in college.

WHAT?!  But I thought you were a government teacher, Amy!

Well, yes, I am.  I accepted a job teaching Government and Economics knowing it was not my passion or strength but hoping beyond hope that I would eventually be able to teach the subject that really gets me going – Theatre.

Some might tell you that is not the best way to go about getting the job you want and even I recognize that it’s not an ideal situation but it’s the truth.  My little secret.

The reason I decided to divulge this information today is because I started thinking about the insecurities that come with being asked to do something you’re not very good at.  For me, it takes me out of my comfort zone and goes against my personality and my personal mantra: If you can’t do something well, don’t do it at all. (Incidentally, that's why you'll never catch me playing a game of chess. I suck at strategy.)

I’ve been thinking about this predicament in terms of obeying the call God has placed on my life.  I’m well aware that He often asks believers to serve in areas that are weaknesses rather than strengths.  That whole “when you’re weak, you’re strong” business is VERY difficult for me to grasp sometimes and if I’m being completely honest, I’m reluctant to get on board with tasks that are not closely related to my areas of “expertise.”

As I type that out, I have to laugh.  I’m really not an expert on anything.  I suppose maybe I’m an expert sinner, but that’s about it.  That certainly doesn’t leave me in a position to lead others or point fingers toward their wrongdoing, does it?

And yet, much like when I was asked to teach Government to high school juniors, I feel God asking me to step out of my comfort zone and address the very issues that I struggle most with. Before I do, please understand that this is not one of those “pick at the speck in your eye while a plank hangs out of mine” situations.  I have spent the better part of 2012 removing said two by four and I am finally able to see more clearly.

Okay, enough build up.  “What’s the issue?” you ask.

Sex outside of marriage.

I know, I know…you’re thinking I’m getting ready to beat a dead horse.  But that’s just it.  This horse is far from dead.

The world would have you and me believe that saving sex for marriage is some archaic practice reserved for the elderly or radical, conservative nut jobs when the fact of the matter is…

It is wrong.  Plain and simple. 

Countless Christians today are ignoring this plain and simple, straightforward truth.  They are going about their lives, attending church, trying to make right decisions in other areas but all the while ignoring God’s instruction in this one.

How do I know that?  Because I was that Christian for many years (until very recently) and because I watch it in friend after friend after friend…

Until now I have not said anything because I recognize what a hypocrite that would make me and because I am so hesitant to hurt feelings or step on toes or make enemies.  But today I came across a passage that gave me the courage to speak up on this very uncomfortable topic. 

In the book of Jeremiah it speaks of false prophets.  Chapter 23, verses 16 and 17 describe them in this way:

            “They speak visions from their own minds, not from the mouth of the Lord…And to all who follow the stubbornness of their hearts they say, ‘No harm will come to you.’”

I recognize that sin WILL harm us, especially this particular sin and that is why I feel compelled to talk about it.  As your friend, I do not want to step on your toes or anger you, but more importantly – most importantly – I do not want harm to come to you.

I’m living proof that sex outside of marriage brings harm - physical harm, emotional harm, relational harm, spiritual harm.  You name it, I’ve probably experienced it to some degree.  It’s taken me a long time to grasp the concept that God is not some mean guy in the sky with a list of things we can’t do but rather a loving father who longs to protect his children.  He didn’t ask us to save ourselves for marriage because he’s a killjoy – he wants us to experience the husband and wife relationship the way it was intended to be.

Yes, I’m sad that I messed that up but what really brings me to tears is the fact that I know God has forgiven me and that if I will just be patient, He will show me that he’s not through with me yet.

It may seem that God is asking a lot of you to wait, to be pure, to say no to this particular temptation but I’m asking you to trust that He has so many blessings he wants to pour out in your life if you will be obedient.

And if, like me, you think there’s just no way you will win this battle because you’re too weak, I ask you to remember that through your weakness God wants to make His power known.

A piece of information I should include here is that one year after I accepted the position of teaching Government and Economics, I was offered the Theatre Teacher’s job.  Looking back, I’m so glad I stepped out of my comfort zone and agreed to teach in spite of what I saw as a weakness.  Now I have a job that I truly love and get excited about. 

Will you step out of your comfort zone and agree to obey in spite of what may seem like a weakness or impossibility in your life?

God’s word promises…blessings await if you do.